


Variations on Your Violence

by sinaddict



Category: Veronica Mars (TV)
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-11-15
Updated: 2004-11-15
Packaged: 2017-10-08 08:18:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/74576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinaddict/pseuds/sinaddict
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Lilly's name between them again, just like it always is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Variations on Your Violence

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers for "The Girl Next Door." There's something for everybody in this one including Logan/Lilly, Lilly/Duncan, Duncan/Veronica, Weevil/Logan, and Duncan/Logan, along with hints of Logan/Veronica/Duncan, Logan/Lilly/Duncan, Lilly/Veronica, Weevil/Veronica and Weevil/Lilly friendship.

**01 // handcuffed in the present tense**

Logan hates Sunday mornings.

He didn't always hate them. Back when Lilly was still alive, he spent them with her and Duncan and Veronica, their own little family tradition that amused the hell out of Jake Kane, but since it was Lilly's idea, he just smiled and made sure the cook was in the kitchen promptly at eight so that by the time Logan picked up Veronica and arrived there, breakfast was sitting on the table waiting for them.

Lilly was most often still in bed.

Jake Kane, not being a complete idiot, had to know what was going on. Logan figures he was encouraging it in his own odd way by making sure he and Celeste were out of the house by eight. And Logan would leave Duncan and Veronica in the breakfast alcove in front of the fireplace with the newspaper, and he'd go to wake up Lilly.

Well, that was the pretense. Everybody knew what was really going on, though.

He remembers the way she'd groan and tell him that it was the weekend and no sane person should get up before noon on a weekend, and _damn it, Logan, quit reminding me that this was my idea_!

And then she'd grab him by the belt loop on his pants and pull him into bed with her, and they'd make love like it was their last time ever and he'd hold her in his arms and wish they could stay like that, because he was going to have to go home and deal with his mother when he left.

Without Lilly, all he has Sunday mornings are his father berating him for being a fuck-up at one thing or another, his mother checking to make sure there was still enough scotch in the house to serve an entire small country if it happened to drop in, and tourists in the driveway waiting to take pictures of the garbage can he accidentally knocked over last night.

Christ, there's nothing worse than a Sunday morning without Lilly.

~

**02 // mind games and pretty girls**

Lilly's pretty sure she's not in heaven.

If she is, she wants to know if it's possible to kill yourself when you're already dead, because DAMN was this ever boring. At least when she was alive, she could annoy Duncan or call Veronica or make out with Logan to pass the free time.

Now she just gets to sit here and watch them completely screw up their lives without her there to tell them what to do. It's not nearly as interesting as someone else might think. "God, you people are hopeless sometimes," she rolls her eyes at Logan making another smartass comment to the teacher. "Watching you being in detention is about as much fun as waiting for the blood to dry."

Lilly hates being bored.

She's got this list of things she wanted to do before she died. Obviously, some of the things probably weren't going to happen even if she lived to be a hundred, -- having sex on the teacup ride at Disneyland probably wasn't even physically possible, after all -- but there are some things she thinks she might just get accomplished after death.

Things like getting rid of Logan's dad-slash-making Logan's dad pay for all the shitty things he did to his son. Lilly's a little bit old-school like that, an eye for an eye, and she'd love to see Aaron Echolls in hell, being whipped by a thousand Logans for eternity.

More immediate on her list, though is taking care of Logan himself. And Duncan. She looks in on Veronica often enough to know that her friend finally became the girl she always knew was hiding under that slightly goody-goody, overly sensible and logical exterior. This new Veronica can take care of herself without anybody's help.

Logan and Duncan are another story.

~

**03 // a cracked song in the universe**

When they turned twelve, Duncan remembers, there was some sort of weird role-reversal that happened overnight. One minute Lilly was telling their parents that _she_ was the one who _accidentally_ broke that ugly-but-expensive vase in the living room when she _accidentally_ tackled Logan in the midst of indoor football, and the next he was telling their mother that it was his fault there was pancake batter dried to the ceiling.

He still doesn't know how Lilly managed to do that.

He doesn't even want to think about the time he managed to convince their parents that he was the one responsible for the strawberry glaze stains on their mother's white silk dress, because any way you play it, it still came out a really odd and kinky explanation.

Lilly laughed her ass off teasing him about how if he was going to cross-dress, he should have had better taste than their mother's clothes.

Duncan knows their relationships were more than just LoganandLilly and DuncanandVeronica like everybody else thought. He misses the DuncanandLogan part where they'd slouch against the sofa playing Grand Theft Auto until three in the morning because Logan was determined that he was going to win one sooner or later.

And Lilly would be curled up between them, her head on Duncan's lap while Logan absently stroked his fingers up and down her hip, and Duncan would pause the game to tell Logan, "She'd better not ever cry because of you, man."

Logan would invariably respond with something joking like, "If she was, she'd be faking," or, "Does that include when I get her drunk and convince her to start piercing things?"

But then he'd turn serious and they'd both look down at Lilly, looking so innocent and angelic when she was sleeping, and Logan would tell him, "I'll never make her cry."

And Duncan believed him with everything he had in him.

He still misses the DuncanandLilly part more. He misses the way Lilly would sneak into his room at night and crawl under the covers with him and just chatter nonstop for hours because she had a nightmare and didn't want to go back to sleep, and _Duncan, why didn't you stop me from watching House on Haunted Hill_?

Sometimes, before he takes his pill in the morning, he aches to hear her voice again so much he can't breathe.

But the pills take care of that.

~

**04 // i think it's time i show you what i'm made of**

The first time Veronica kissed Duncan, she thought, "You kiss just like Lilly does," because Lilly was the one who taught her how to kiss in the first place, and she wouldn't be entirely surprised to find out that Lilly had taught Duncan, too.

She also figures that Lilly's the one who taught Duncan how to touch her in all the right places, because Duncan was so good at touching her that neither of them needed to rush to have sex. For some reason, when the four of them were together, she had never considered it odd that Lilly was the one who taught everybody else in the group about sex.

Veronica wonders now if there was more going on than she let herself see the first time around.

Lilly's favorite game was always Truth or Dare, most often with some kind of added rule about any truth having to include a shot of liquor to get things really moving, and most of what Veronica knows about sex and boys now is because of those games. She knows that Logan was a virgin until he started dating Lilly, -- big surprise there -- and that seventy-percent of the female population (that voted in Cosmo surveys, anyway) had fantasies about doing two guys at once.

And on her next turn, Lilly had dared Veronica to kiss Logan and Duncan, and proceeded to demonstrate how to do so when Veronica begged off that she didn't know how to kiss two guys at once.

A tiny little part of Veronica thinks Logan's not that big a jackass yet since he's never once used that piece of information against her.

Still, Veronica's getting more and more curious everyday about whether their inter-group relationships might have something to do with Lilly's death. At least, that's what she's telling herself is motivating her need to find out, and she has heard these rumors lately about Lilly...

"So I've got this thing I'm working on," Veronica smiles into her cell phone, knowing that Weevil will help her out if he can. "You wanna do me a little favor?"

~

**05 // looks the same but there's something missing**

Weevil's pretty damn sure he's got the movie star's son figured out by the fourth day of detention. And he was able to do it in complete silence since the movie star's son hadn't spoken to him since the first day and the mess with his tattoo.

Lilly probably would've laughed at the whole thing, he thinks.

He wasn't part of her little group -- her family, she'd said, because _Eli, family isn't blood, it's the people you need to live everyday_ \-- but he knew that she hadn't mentioned him to any of them. He knew Veronica hadn't known because up until he talked to her this afternoon she assumed that all the rumors were just rumors.

The movie star's kid clearly does not believe that Lilly was his sister's name, and he kinda thinks Lilly would be upset if he let her boyfriend believe they were screwing around behind his back. God only knows why, since Princess could do a lot better in his opinion.

They're on the back wall of the Henderson building way the fuck out at the back of the campus when Weevil decides to bring it up, if not just for respect of Lilly, but for the debt he owes from Chardo, and he doesn't look at Logan as he says, "She'd never cheat on you."

He catches the movie star's kid freeze in his peripheral vision, and slowly turn toward him. "What?"

"Lilly Kane," Weevil tells him as he covers a particularly beautiful section of paint with the drab beige color that's supposed to be better. "She'd never do nothing behind your back. She seems like the type who'd tell you straight out if she wasn't happy about something, you know?"

He watches Logan in his peripheral vision, and the boy doesn't seem to know whether he's mad or not, so when Logan throws down his roller and starts toward him, Weevil preps himself for a fight and wonders whether Princess would hold it against him for breaking her boyfriend's nose. Logan's right up in his face, looking pissed as all hell as he says, "You didn't even know her."

Weevil's not sure who moved first, but fuck if he wasn't suddenly enjoying the hell out of Logan's mouth in broad daylight behind the school where God and anybody could see, and he gets what Princess saw in this guy now because Logan's a fucking good kisser.

And he thinks she would've enjoyed seeing it.

Princess was a little kinky, too, and that's something he never thought he'd say about his little sister.

~

**06 // loud and clear but you still don't get it**

Logan is thirty-seven minutes late getting home.

He knows this because he now has thirty-seven bruises on his back from the hand-tooled Columbian leather belt his father bought while filming "Fierce Instinct" in Bogota. There are little imprints, he's sure, of the embossed design on the leather now covering his back.

He wonders how many welts he'd have gotten if he told the reporter there for the family photo-op that he was late because he was busy fooling around with their ex-maid's grandson in a janitor's closet, and yes, he hadn't come that hard since before Lilly died that time that they got Duncan drunk...

Somehow, he doubts he'd be standing if he had said that.

Instead, he'd made the mistake of saying he'd been in detention, which of course, Aaron Echolls' son should NEVER be in because being in detention meant he did something wrong.

Really, he thinks his father is more pissed that he got caught, though.

He doesn't even think about going to Duncan. It's habit now. He's been going to Duncan after his father's little punishment sessions since he was thirteen, and one afternoon in a janitor's closet with Weevil's talented hands and even better mouth isn't going to change that.

Duncan won't care, either. Nobody understands sex as an escape mechanism better than Duncan. Duncan usually just fucks girls to forget everything.

Except when Logan's there.

~

**07 // you want the truth but you look right through it**

It's two-seventeen in the morning when Duncan finds Logan standing at his window. He knows this because he was already awake, had been lying in bed awake for the better part of four hours, just staring at the ceiling with the ridiculous glow-in-the-dark stars that Lilly and Veronica had glued all over his room one afternoon while he was at baseball practice.

He doesn't bother greeting Logan as he opens the window because they both know why Logan's here in the middle of the night and saying hello or asking how he's doing seems more like an insult than a polite greeting.

Duncan keeps a first aid kit under his bed just for Logan.

Surprisingly, Logan seems to have taken Duncan's advice to heart and picked a belt with a less showy buckle this time, because Duncan doesn't have to clean up any blood or cuts, just lets his fingers linger over the bruises with a cream that's supposed to ease the pain.

They never talk during this part, Duncan realizes. It's always silence except for Logan's slight hisses of pain and Duncan's sad sighs at the same mess he's been cleaning up since they were thirteen and Logan wanted to run away, and even during the time Logan was with Lilly, it was always, always Duncan he came to like this.

Duncan thinks Lilly knew, but she let them have this the same way she'd play messenger for himself and Veronica in teaching them what would really get each other off without taking things too far.

Christ. Lilly.

And he almost can't breathe again. And he can't take another pill for six hours.

Instead, he lets his hands wander over Logan's body, and it's so natural to touch Logan for comfort that it's almost better than taking pills because Logan has the memory of Lilly on him the same way Duncan himself does.

Logan's always the one who undresses them both because even beaten down like this, Logan's still stronger than Duncan is without Lilly to give him strength, and Duncan thinks it would upset Lilly to know that the only time he feels close to her anymore is when he's fucking her boyfriend.

Then again, Lilly would probably get off on that.

But then Logan's mouth takes his and the world narrows in until there's nothing left but Logan's hands and Logan's mouth and Logan's body moving against his until he can't think anything but Logan's name and _godfuckyestherethere_ because he was so close he couldn't breathe anymore.

And it's Lilly's name between them again, just like it always is.


End file.
